Sunday, January 11, 2009

oh no! more stupid dating stuff

Here's an interesting dilemma, why do I now feel rejected by random internet guy who imed me at 4am last night to say he's sorry but he doesn't really want to be committed to me?
like I want to magically be committed to random internet guy? Like oh god, what would be scarier than suddenly finding myself committed to this guy I met online who I don't know at all?
Why on earth would that hurt my feelings? I spent most of the first day he was here wondering when exactly he was going to leave. I HATE HATE HATE the subconscious girl part of my brain that gets attached to people if I sleep with them even if the point of sleeping with them was to sleep with someone I'm not attached to.
I got really mad at him for assuming that I even wanted to date him, but of course if it made me sad then he was right, which makes me even more annoyed.

(I promise I'll write a post about art (or at least about buffy) sometime soon as a break from all this stupid relationship nonsense. I think I was a lot more interesting when I was just in a longterm relationship and didn't have to think about this stuff so much).

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